Twin Flame Time Frame
I’ve been with Will (my Twin Flame) for almost 1.5 years now. We tend to refer to the length of time in our relationship to that of dog years –everything is amplified by at least x 7.
Yep, we met as friends in November 2016, in a relationship by February 2017 (that part did take slower), by end of February we were talking about babies, September we were living together, October pregnant (with an unfortunate miscarriage in January).
We knew very early on that we would be getting married (always looking at 2019) and by beginning of May I chose the design of the ring to be made with the decision to use my diamond from South Africa (from my mom’s marriage to my father).
My priority was still on falling pregnant and in my eyes the wedding would happen when it happens.
OK let me slow it down a bit. About April 2017 I started having dreams about us in the Townships with my Sangoma Tribe in ceremony. Although in the dream our hands were tied I was pretty sure it was a merging of our Ancestors.
In my head Sangoma ceremony in June 2017 my Sangoma Mother confirmed in deed Will was to come to the land for ceremony, where our Ancestors would be united to work together to protect our relationship.
It felt right and we were guided to head to South Africa in May 2018 for some healing time together, adventure and a ceremony!!
We were spending a couple of nights in a hotel in a not so great part of Cape Town, but it was the closest and safest hotel to get in and out of the Townships relatively quickly. That day I woke up with so much energy and excitement I remember hanging over Will’s face (as he slept soundly) shouting “IT’S CEREMONY DAY” – a bit of a shock waking no doubt. Dancing around we got dressed and ready to head to the Townships for our special day on uniting our Ancestors.
Thembi’s house was filled with Sangoma’s, family and friends that I have met over the last 3 years and it was such a welcome and blessing to see them all again. There was singing, dancing, drumming and drinking with the Ancestors (I just wet my lips as I was driving). We were standing outside the house when a Police car drove and stopped staring at these 2 white people in beads in a black Township wondering what to do, but we smiled and waved that we were in deed safe and here out of free will
In the height of the ceremony there was a lot of crying and chanting in Zulu and I leaned in towards Will whispering “this is starting to feel like a wedding!” Will, who was by now pretty intoxicated having to drink mine and his neat spirits with the Sangomas for the Ancestors, agreed that it did, but it was a beautiful experience. Next thing we hear “where are the rings?” to my response “WHAT?” Next thing we hear “husband and wife”, with people crying and cheering. Puzzled looks on our faces Will leans over and says “Did we just get married?
Yes, indeed we found ourselves in a Tribal Wedding and are now married in our Zulu Tribe. After enjoying the rest of a stunning ceremony, I drove my not so sober Husband back to the dodgy area we were staying in (yep apparently our honeymoon night). Not before stopping at the Spur (a family restaurant) for steak and alcohol. I did the right thing and bought a six pack of savannah’s (cider) for me and beers for Will, where we stayed in the hotel room for the night with me spending most the time repeating “how the hell did we just get married”.
Next day I had time to digest everything and I was very pleased that we had our Tribal wedding first. We didn’t share it with many people and the rest of our holiday was one big honeymoon.
Where does this leave us?
We didn’t legalise the Tribal Wedding (it was sacred and for us only), but we do call each other husband and wife and in our eyes we very much are. The engagement ring is finally ready, and I’ll wait for Will to pop the question and we are hoping for the western wedding maybe 2019 (which was always the plan), but is very much dependant on pregnancy, etc.
It pretty much sums up our relationship really – Tribal Marriage (the day I accidently got married), then engagement and then Western Wedding (which of course will not be traditional). And who knows what surprises they will throw at us in between that, but I can’t wait to find out.